Waiting for a Husband: A Guest Post

Not too long ago, I wrote about my friend Shelly's wedding here.  But, I didn't really say as much about it as I wanted to...

Shelly was one of my first (not from high school) friends when I moved back to Roanoke after college five years ago.  As the area director for Young Life at the time, she quickly welcomed me into a beautiful community of young people loving and serving the Lord in Roanoke.  Over the years, as we led on a team together, she became an important relationship in my life.

I always considered Shelly a kind-of spiritual mentor in my life.  Her faith and trust in the Lord was SO obvious from the first time you spent any time talking to her.  One of the areas where this was the most evident (although really, it seeped through her entire life) was in her wait for a Godly husband.  I loved her attitude about guarding her heart but still be open to dating (Who am I to complain if someone wants to take me out to dinner?  He just might be The One), but also the way she did not sit around pining for a husband... Her life was FULL - full of joy and relationships and life - with or without a man.

This spring, she married Ben.  She is 33 years old but younger and more beautiful than ever.  Their wedding ceremony was SO special... Not just because we could tangibly see the Lord answering her prayers, but because she and Ben both made such an effort to glorify God and the story he has written in their lives up to this point.  When we left, I immediately told Jeff - "that testimony has to be shared.. I'm going to put it on my blog"...

So, today, with her permission of course, I am sharing Shelly's testimony of waiting and trusting.  Her sister read this during the wedding.  It is long, but it is SO worth reading. It is powerful and so true.  I hope it will speak to some of your hearts that are waiting for your husband now or anyone who is in a season of waiting and trusting...

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For me this has been a journey of faith.  For a long time I liked the idea of getting married but hoped it wouldn't happen any time soon ;)  .  I was sure as soon as I was ready, Prince Charming would be waiting in the wings to sweep me off my feet.

But as I approached my late 20's and began feeling an interest in looking for Mr. Right and settling down, God gave me a verse that made me a little nervous: He showed me Romans 4: 16-22.

Therefore, the promise comes by faith, so that it may be by grace . . . He (Abraham) is our father in the sight of God, in whom he believed—the God who gives life to the dead and calls into being things that were not. 

Against all hope, Abraham in hope believed and so became the father of many

nations, just as it had been said to him, “So shall your offspring be.”

Without weakening in his faith, he faced the fact that his body was as good as

dead—since he was about a hundred years old—and that Sarah’s womb was also dead.

Yet he did not waver through unbelief regarding the promise of God, but was

strengthened in his faith and gave glory to God, being fully persuaded that

God had power to do what he had promised. This is why “it was credited to him

as righteousness.”

Somehow I knew that God was giving me this verse about my husband and that it would be an area where I would live on hope and faith for a while and have to believe in His promise even when all my circumstances indicated otherwise.  Just like Abraham believed he could have a child just as God had promised even when his body was 'as good as dead.' I was to believe for my husband even if he wasn't anywhere on the horizon. So while I never doubted God had someone out there for me I did wonder if I'd meet him In this century.

Around this same time someone was praying for me and said they got a strong sense that I should start praying for my husband.  This went against my grain because I'm a firm believer in living in the present content with your circumstances.  So I didn't like investing my time and energy to a hypothetical someday person.  But I did see this wisdom in this so I asked some of my close friends Mary, Melanie, and Kristen, and Wendy to join me in praying weekly for each other and our husbands.  I also started this journal of prayers for him so I could write things down to pray for him and go back and pray over them from time to time.  These ladies and many more were such wonderful gifts of encouragement for me on this journey of faith.

Along the way guys came and went.  I was told I was too pickey, unrealistic, needed to move to a city with more men . . . I was set up on more dates than I can count But I was sure that God would keep his promise He would find me when the time was right.  I had to believe I didn't have to make anything happen in my own strength (like abraham having a child with Hagar to try to fulfill the promise for God)  I could trust God to fulfill the promise all by Himself.
 

Along the way God said WAIT, HOPE, TRUST, REST time and time again and encouraged me with verses such as:

Psalm 25  "No one whose hope is in YOU will ever be put to shame"

Psalm 27 "I would have despaired unless I believed that I would see the goodness of the lord in the land of the living. Wait for the Lord; Be strong and let your heart take courage, yes, wait for the Lord."

Hebrews 11 "Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see . . . And without faith it is impossible to please God"

Isaiah 30:15 - "In repentance and rest is your salvation, in quietness and trust is your strength"

and Proverbs 31 - "Strength and dignity are her clothing, And she smiles at the future."

He also encouraged me in the reality that He meets all my needs. He told me "I am my beloved's, I have been called "MINE, belonging to me" by my creator, lover, father."

One time my mentor at church, Jean, told me to ask God why I wasn't married yet. So I did, and later that week I was driving and listening to a new CD and all of a sudden I knew the words to this song was my answer:

"You make all things beautiful just in time.  Its just a matter of time. Into your hands I fall on you I'll wait God, on you I'll wait all of my days. No one who waits on your will ever be ashamed.  It's just a matter of time. Calm down my soul, calm down and know no one who waits on the Lord will ever be ashamed, wisdom will be justified, in just a matter of time.  You will make all things beautiful just in time."

And THAT was the truth!

So God and I have taken this journey and He has been faithful to keep his promise.

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Now, in this area of my life, my faith has been made sight, and I have the promised one instead of the promise.  But the faith journey is not over, and this part of my life has only proven to me God's faithfulness and will help me be that much more confident in the next promise and the next phase of my life.  I've heard marriage is not easy, there are questions of kids, finances, jobs, living location, . . . But in all things I know this for both me and for you.  God works ALL things together for good for those who fear the Lord.  His mercies are new every morning.  And his plan is for us to keep living by faith, trusting in the promises, and believing in his character in every area of our lives. My story is the story God's writing for me, and I'm excited for the next chapter. ;)