Monday, January 25, 2010


Ok... A little something you might not know about me: I am an eavesdropper.  I LOVE to listen in on other people's conversations, and I am not ashamed of it.  *I am a good secret-keeper and a very trustworthy friend; but, if you are in a public place, and you are speaking loudly enough that I can hear you at another table/bench/etc.  I consider your conversation fair game... I like to think this is the "writer" in me.  Go with it.

Now that that is out of the way...
This Sunday was the perfect rainy afternoon, so after church and a plethora of meetings, Jeff and I took advantage of the opportunity to sit in our favorite coffee shop and consume excessive amounts of hot caffeine.  Little did I know when I settled down with my java and lesson plans, what a "show" I was in for two tables over.  (Cara, if you read this, I couldn't hear what you and your sis were talking about - no worries!)

In all my eavesdropping experience, I have never had someone make it SO easy for me to follow their discussion.  This woman - who, according to my calculations, was counseling a friend about a bad relationship and seeking advice on her own latest rendevous with a 43 year old man in Texas - literally laid out her entire life story in a tidy little timeline.  I learned ALL about her first marriage and divorce, raising three kids under the age of four, parenting teenagers, and adult-dating.  In fact, by the time she left, I had enough information that I could actually pull up pictures of her and her family on my Facebook account to show Jeff a slide-show as I summarized my "investigative findings."  It was glorious!! (Stalkerish, yes, but glorious all the same!)

Jeff, as you might have guessed, is VERY unsupportive of this hobby.  Personally, I think he is just jealous because his hearing isn't as good as mine and sometimes he can't follow what I am saying to him, much less another conversation; but, I digress.  Typically, I am quite good at managing basic small-talk with him while listening in on others (that's the magical teacher trait), but sometimes he does have to yell at me to stop craning my neck, staring, zoning out, etc.  I guess I can imagine how this would be embarrassing for him. Also, in his defense, sometimes I get entirely too wrapped up in the sagas around me.  For example, once, in a Chinese restaurant, I was CONVINCED that the couple in the booth behind us was breaking up.  I was very distraught all through dinner and even suggested that Jeff and I pray for them.  In the end, I realized they were simply discussing whether or not they should move to a house with no stairs as they aged.  I think I watch too much TV.

Anyway, I'm wondering... Does anyone else eavesdrop? If not, I highly recommend it. But, I do suggest you enlist a "monitor" - like Jeff is for me - to keep you from going too far.  (*Facebook stalking may be going too far, I admit.)  I'd LOVE to hear how your first attempts go!

And, to those skeptics out there that are judging me right now... Consider this a warning to you the next time  you share your deepest darkest secrets with only your closest friend at a public coffee shop.  Look, I'm just trying to help out greater mankind one piece of advice at a time. -E


  1. I love this post! You made me giggle, as I was envisioning you totally wrapped up in the conversations going on around you. Now, I can't say I've ever gone so far as to Facebook stalk after an eavesdropping session, but my Husband does indeed remind to pay attention to him and not the other people around me.... it's just so interesting to listen!

  2. Hahaha... yea, Davey definitely noticed your eavesdropping when we went to Alejandro's a few weeks ago. He said that you must have memorized the menu because you were staring at it so intently and for so long as you eavesdropped on crazy/nutty drunk girl next to you (and probably others!)Have you thought of brainstorming new "techniques" and ways to hide the fact that you're eavesdropping? Poor Jeff :)

  3. I'm not gonna lie... I'm a little embarrassed that I was that obvious. Oops. I better start working on my style.

  4. bahahaha... this is hilarious. I think eavesdropping might be a girl thing because we, unlike our husbands, are very good at doing two things at once. It's a gift, really. How can you NOT!? The worst is when you're standing in line or something listening to the people behind you and you have to move out of line and don't get to finish. I hate it when they leave me hanging.

  5. You are sooo not alone. I love this post, it speaks to me.

    As for practicing ... I will help you. I can certainly support Jeff in this, because like him, I have experienced this. It happens a lot.

    I love you, and have not problems with this, as long as you are sharing the juice. I mean, you really aren't harming anyone. What is the likelihood that you will see them again? I mean really.

  6. P.S. Definitely ran into said woman from the coffee shop LAST NIGHT. We locked eyes. It was very awkward. Let's hope she doesn't read my blog. (You never know when there is an eavesdropper/blogger in your midst.)

  7. e - your blog is hilarious.
    and, this is totally me. my poor hub. while i'm here, your jeggings post killed me. seriously killed me. 4am. sick hub. pulling photos off the web to ensure you accurately inform your readers of this (terrifying) new trend. now that's above and beyond.
    ps i learned that santa was married to mommy on your blog. i'm 37. talk about naive and slow to the draw. thank goodness you saved me from myself.
    - brooke (little lindsey's sis)


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