Thursday, January 12, 2012

Boy Mom

First, THANK YOU THANK YOU for linking up yesterday... I LOVE it!  Can't wait to have some time this weekend to curl up with coffee and some good ole confession reading. :)

I'm a boy mom.  Even typing that out feels funny to me... Before Sam was born, I always envisioned myself with a little girl to play "house" with, put BIG bows on, take shopping, and one day, plan a wedding with.  (Pathetic, I know.) 


It's not that I'm especially girly; but my (unfair) image of mothers of boys was that they had to be obsessed with sports and not care a bit about their looks, their house, or party planning.  Ha!

For the first 20 weeks of my pregnancy, I was convinced I was carrying a girl.  And - I can safely admit it now - I was a teeny bit disappointed when my motherly intuition failed me for the first time, and we saw a little (um, how should I say this...) thing on the ultrasound.

Being a mother of a boy was an idea I took the next 20 weeks of my pregnancy to get used to.  During that time, I decided I could still be a cute mom (one that wears pearls to football games), could still have a pretty house (with just slightly more blue than pink), and would still share many special moments with a son (even if they aren't at the mall or wedding dress shopping).  *Plus, I convinced myself that my future daughter-in-law will appreciate all my memory keeping and cutesy things from Sam's childhood one day, even if he won't.

I prepared myself for "getting sprayed" when changing diapers and some of the other less glamorous parts of raising boys (p-u-b-e-r-t-y); BUT... I didn't really prepare myself for how much I would LOVE being a boy mom...

- I love that I don't feel pressure to put him in an adorably matched outfit every day.
- I love that I'll have to keep a stocked pantry for a house full of hungry boys after sports practices etc.
- I love that I'll be a regular on the bleachers (even if I'm reading my Kindle there).
- I love that I get to teach him how to treat girls; and always be the first girl in his life.
- I love saying "my boys" and watching my husband with his son.

... Just to name a few. :)

I went to a shower last weekend for my friend Meg who is about to have a little girl, and someone asked me if all the monograms and cute dresses made me want to have girl.  My answer?  No.  I couldn't have said that six months ago...

Don't get me wrong, I'd LOVE to have a little girl one day - I think the bond between a mother and her daughter is something incredibly special (and fun).  BUT, I've realized recently that I quite like being a boy mom - it suits me just fine.  And, if I spend the rest of my life cleaning up muddy shoes and planning airplane parties instead of princess ones --- I'll be happy and content.

It's a good feeling.

Anyway, I got to thinking about all of this because of a post from Team Studer on 25 Rules for Mothers of SonsIf you are a mom to boys and you haven't already checked it out, I strongly recommend that you get over there asap (she even has the list in printable format now).

And finally, since we're on the subject of motherhood, etc., go visit Through Clouded Glass today - I'm being featured on Callie's "Moms and Babies" series.  ;) 

Boy Moms - I know you're out there.  What's your favorite part?

Almost Friday friends!

26 comments:

  1. I love this post! I agree with you on so many of these. I particularly love that I'm Luke's girl- he first (and only!) girl- his favorite girl- his mama. And I'd be lying if I didn't say I loved buying baseball hats as well. :)

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  2. But what if sports aren't his thing? What if there is never a daughter-in-law (for any number of reasons). I don't have a son, so I'm speaking a little from the outside, but why must there be such a dichotomy? That's mostly a rhetorical question. I just don't get it. When I was pregnant, people freaked out that I wasn't going to find out the gender of my twins. They would ask how I was going to prepare. Um, don't all babies need jammies, a crib, diapers, etc? Must those things be pink or blue? Must those things have sayings like "mama's boy" or "daddy's girl" on them? I don't want you to think I'm judging you, because I'm not. I just think that many of your (valid) points beg these other questions.

    For the record, as a mom to girls, I do dress them up in "girly" clothes. I also dress them in dark colors, hoody sweatshirts, jeans, and dinosaur/monster/monkey/non-pink and purple clothes all the time. They have baby dolls and they have dump trucks and a football. I don't see a need to narrow their options at such a young age. Other than putting them in dresses and not cutting their hair, there is nothing we do with our girls than we would have done had they been boys.

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  3. I kind of needed this post. Because I'm the opposite. Now that I have a girl, I'm scared to have a boy. I want another girl so bad because I don't know HOW to be a boy mom. So I'm nervous about being disappointed if my next is a boy...because having sisters sounds so awesome to me (probably b/c I'm so close with me)...and I may need a little time to adjust. But I know I WILL adjust and be fine. And happy. But for some reason I'm just nervous. Ok. Enough word vomit.

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  4. I felt like I knew it was a boy, and then the ultrasound confirmed it. I was very excited. This boy would be my oldest, he could be a big brother to all his siblings (hopefully :)). But I was scared. I only had a sister. I don't know anything about raising boys. After 10 months on the job, I can say I am loving it. It really doesn't matter if your child is a girl or a boy. You love them and learn how to care for them. Yes, I do look longingly at girls' clothes sometimes, but I wouldn't trade my little boy for anything. I am out numbered at my house (husband, son, 2 male dogs). That just means I have to try hard to make sure there is enough girlyness in our house!

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  5. Hi there! I'm a newbie visiting from Callie's blog. :) I too am a mommy to a sweet boy who is 8 months! I love being a mommy to a boy. I love how "all boy" he is. They play rough even as babies and it is hillarious! The no matchy thing is pretty awesome too! ;)

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  6. I'm a Boy Auntie and I love it!! I was really hoping for a girl so I'd have a niece but i have to say, I love playing trucks, and that he makes vroom vroom noises all the time!

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  7. Seriously, I think we were destined to be friends. I'm having a boy soon (end of March) as my first child, and, while right before we found out he's a boy, I had a feeling he was. But I confess to still being a teensy bit disappointed, too (at the time), because in my family, I have one sister, my bff, and then our closest cousins were girls, too. I know little girls. (Ironically, I get along GREAT with the boys in my high school classes, always have.) I'd pictured a little girl, without even realizing it. So for the last few months, I refuse to let myself check out the cute little girl babies and toddlers, and focus on the boys, to try to wrap my head around that concept. Just yesterday I was telling a friend that I wonder about the relationship between mom and son. People say it's still really special. I hope so! You just keep reminding me that being a boy mom is amazing, please, and hopefully I'll agree soon!

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  8. Hi! I've been following your blog for a month or so now and believe this is my first comment! Eek! I just loved today's post. I'm a boy mom too and felt the exact same way when I was told we were having a boy. I was SO sure it was a girl, but six nurses told me I was wrong. For all the reasons you have listed and more I have come to LOVE being a boy mom. J, my little one, is almost 10 months old now and I'm beginning to see the adventurer in him. Someone told me the other day he is "all boy" and they're right. It's so heart-warming to see his little gentlemen of a personality develop! I'm just praying that my future DIL is the bees knees lol

    Thanks for sharing today!

    confessionsofamagnoliamom.blogspot.com

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  9. I agree! I LOVED having Parker first! I will admit that Avery is WAY more fun to dress but I'm so drawn to boy toys and room decor! Madras prints and seersucker on a little boy.... I die... L-O-V-E it!. I feel SO blessed to get to experience both genders but you're so right about that special bond with a boy! From experience, my girl is WAY easier than my son at this age but I'm sure I'll be eating those words in a few years! Enjoy your sweet Sam! He's PRECIOUS!

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  10. Since we are being honest ... I was very disappointed when I found out I was having a boy almost 9 years ago! I had them check again to make sure! Ha. Now I can say that I am so grateful to have a boy. I love being the soccer mom who takes him to games and the one he hugs right after they are done. He says the sweetest things to me and I love him to pieces. I couldn't imagine being a girl mom now.

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  11. I love being a boy mom! I love how full of energy he is (even though he's still a baby), I love that he's already a Mama's boy, I love that he'll be a big brother some day. I'm so excited about all of the things we have to look forward to in the future!

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  12. Being a boy mom is one of the biggest most unexpected joys of my life! I for some reason never envisioned having a boy so when she became a he, there were a few days of crying, a week to accept it, and then I was over the moon. And Rowen is my light, he's a funny, busy, loud little boy and I love it. It's so disappointing that when people see me sometimes they say hopefully the next one will be a girl. While I would love to have a girl, I'm ok if the next one is another little boy since I have grown to love being a boy mom so much. Great post!

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  13. This is such a wonderful post! I don't have kids yet (working on that), but for the longest time i kept saying I only wanted girls or i wanted at least 1 girl. But suddenly I have grown really excited about the thought of having a boy (or boys). I still would like one girl, but if it doesn't happen it's okay. it may have been holding my cousins baby boy all during Christmas that got me totally happy with the thought of being a mom to boys.

    But my good friend is pregnant now & will find out what she is having in 3 weeks. She wants a girl SO BAD that i'm almost afraid for her if it's a boy! If it IS a boy, i will definitely send her the link to this post. ;)

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  14. I don't have any babies yet, but I really want a girl, because I never had a sister and I want that chance to have a family of girls and all things girlie. But, that being said, since I had two brothers, I relate really well to all things boys, so I'm hoping I would be 100% with either. Your list of what you love about being a boymom put things into perspective. That picture of your husband and son is absolutely adorable. Thanks for this post:)

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  15. I love being a boy mom, but I was also kind of rattled (okay, disappointed - but I got over it) when I found out my 2nd was another boy. Right now, I like being the prettiest girl in my house, and I like using that as mental justification when I want to buy an especially girly article of clothing :) And I'm pretty proud of the fact that I can identify more construction machinery than the average female.

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  16. I love being a boy mom too! I can say that when I was pregnant with my son I was totally convinced that I was having a girl. When I found out he was a boy I was in shock, I wasn't upset, but it honestly had never even occured to me that I'd have anything but a girl...silly I know! I've had so much fun raising a boy. There is no doubt that there is a very special relationship between mother and son. He is 13 now and I am so glad that I get to be there for all the football games, dirtbike riding and drum playing. I waited 7 years in between kids and I thought for sure I was having another boy...and suprise, I had a girl...LOL! Even though there is a pretty big age gap, they are incredibly close and she is into football and dirtbikes too.

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  17. How funny!! I am the EXACT opposite. I thought FOR SURE that I was having a boy for all the same types of reasons that you thought you were having a girl. I was terrified of having a sassy little girl or a teenager with boys chasing her down and all that. But now? Wouldn't change it for the world. Great how God knows better than us, right?

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  18. I was a boy mom for almost 4 years before our daughter was born and loved every second of our mommy-son time.

    Little boys are so sweet and they just love their mommies so much. He is very much into sports and it is fun to see him morphing into a mini-me of my husband with all the facts (useless) info about sports, watching him play, and one day when he's a famous baseball player thanking his mom for pitching all those baseballs to him in the backyard:) They are rough, dirty, active, and wild (my daughter is too though!) and their love for their mommy is fierce! He melts my heart!

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  19. Have you read a cup of jo's reflections on a boy? http://joannagoddard.blogspot.com/2011/04/motherhood-mondays-on-having-boy.html it is very sweet!

    I always imagined being the mother of girls. I was surprised to find we were having a boy and I have to admit I cried. I think it was the shock of finally knowing what we were having too. But I couldn't even imagine having a girl now - I think Jude is the greatest. My husband really wanted a boy because he wanted to be a good father to a boy since his dad is not the greatest. That makes me so grateful to have a boy!

    One disappointing thing to me is that most cute clothing companies only do cute girl clothes. It seems like people have a harder time coming up with cute boy things! But it's just clothes...

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  20. I Love this, and totally agree! Can't believe I'll be adding another to my little bunch of boys!!!

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  21. Well said! I wouldn't have it any other way ;) BTW- Nathan was talking the other day about coming to your house to hang out with Jeff in his man-cave! :)

    K~

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  22. Hello! What is your email?? When I try to contact you it goes to yahoo and I don't happen to have one. Otherwise, mine is tenntibbs08@aol.com. I have a question about one of the bachelors you have featured. I have a beautiful single friend that might be perfect for one of the guys you featured! ;)

    Rachel Tibbs

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  23. I adore this. I'm a mom of boys too and I can't imagine it any other way!

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  24. I have one little boy and love it so much more than I imagined, too! I had several reasons for waiting to find out the gender until birth, but one of them, I'm a little embarrassed to say, was that I was afraid I'd be disappointed. (I knew there was no way I'd feel like that in the delivery room.) I still love to dress him up cute, but I also love that naturally imposed wallet restriction because I have to look a little harder for cute boy stuff. I love that he's so wild and silly. At 21 months, he's really starting to act like a boy, making funny noises and crashing into everything and it's awesome! So much fun.

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  25. I love this post!! Headed to check out the 25 rules now!

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Your comments are what makes this thing fun! I LOVE to hear from you and do my best to respond to everyone! THANK YOU!


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