Saturday, September 8, 2012

OK

Whenever I write a post like the one from Wednesday, I get a phone call/text from my mom telling me how worried she is about me and how depressed I sound.  Then, I spend the next five minutes convincing her that I am FINE, and the next three days worrying that I sound like a debbie-downer, ungrateful nincompoop (just looked up how to spell that word) on my blog.  BUT, the other thing is, every time I write a post like that - one where I REALLY confess, not just in the funny "I'm wearing my bathing suit as underwear" kind of way - I feel SO much better.  So free.  I blog because of that freedom.  It isn't why I started blogging, or where I thought I was going; but the freedom that comes in trying to be transparent is addicting ya'll.  It feels good.  It feels normal.  Thanks for loving me and encouraging me and just making me feel like an ordinary mom/woman/teacher/etc.

So... I'm just checking in to tell you that I am a-OK.  Life is busy and messy and hard sometimes - no doubt. But, it is also so good.

On Thursday night, the ish (literally) hit the fan... As in, my upstairs toilet overflowed and came flowing into my kitchen through the ceiling fan/light.  When it rains, it pours doesn't it?  (Pun intended... I just crack myself up!)  Naturally, I called my dad since Jeff was out of town and dads can fix everything. Like a super-hero, he was here in five minutes in his dress shirt and khakis fresh from work plunging and cloroxing away.  See, I'm unbelievably blessed.  I don't know how people do it without family around. Really.

Anyway, in the midst of that clean-up, my mom came over and convinced me to go for a walk and decompress.  It was good advice.  Even better though, when I asked "Mom, why am I such a mess? What am I doing wrong?"she just said - "Stop taking naps and surfing the internet in the afternoons.  When Sam is sleeping, you need to get your stuff done.  Then, after he goes to bed at night you will be able to relax and play." 

Why was this so novel to me?  Of course, I knew that.  But, I think I needed to hear it out loud from someone that loves me and knows me.  She was right.  I can get a million pieces of advice and encouragement about cleaning schedules and routines (and don't get me wrong - I love that stuff too); but, the truth is, I've just been acting kind-of lazy.  Period.  (Which, for the record, is ok too - sometimes.  But, I wasn't feeling good about myself or the things around me; which is, not ok.)

And just like that... I was back in the game.

Not that I'm advocating this kind of craziness; but, after Sam went to bed that night, I cleaned my whole house top to bottom.  I mean, really cleaned.  Then, after only four hours of sleep, a morning of work, and a fun play-date to the library with Sam on Friday, I came home and did all my fall decorating during his nap.


Ya'll it was worth it.  

It might be 90 degrees outside, but in my house, it is FALL.  It is clean and cozy and happy.  Jeff is home.  We are watching movies and making pumpkin pancakes and enjoying the couple of days that I actually do feel like I have it together.



We're OK. Better than ok.

P.S. I even recorded one meal on My Fitness Pal yesterday.... Baby steps.

9 comments:

  1. See.....mom's are not so stupid after all!! Now, you sound so much better!!!! love you, honey.

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  2. When I was pregnant with my twins, my mom told me the same thing your mom told you: nap time is for getting sh** done. If you're a person who can relax and feel comfortable in a dirty (not just messy) house, who doesn't mind complete chaos, and has a big enough wardrobe to skip laundry for weeks at a time, then sure, follow that old advice: sleep when baby sleeps. But if you feel best when the chores are done, the house is clean, and you like to eat a good meal for supper, then you will do your work when baby sleeps, pay attention when baby is awake, and get a good night's sleep when baby is in grade school. That's just life for parents.

    I agree that sometimes it's good to be lazy. You need a break, both physical and mental. You need a change of pace, so work-work-work can feel good again. But for the most part, work-work-work is the name of the parenting game.

    Good luck and ENJOY your lovely, autumn home. It looks lovely!

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  3. My Dear Elizabeth, What a lucky young lady you are to have a wonderful Mom to give you such good advice.

    I love you,
    Aunt Delores

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  4. You are so lucky your mom's love's you be happy elizabeth !

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  5. What encouragement! I hope this helps you!

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  6. Great thoughts.. http://frndcpforever.blogspot.in/

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  7. I love that you use MyFitnessPal! :) It is one of my favorite apps/sites! I really enjoy your blog! It's so nice to get a real honest perspective of life. Pumpkin pancakes are also a plus!

    http://chickopinion.blogspot.com

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  8. Yum, pumpkin pancakes. Why is it that pumpkin flavored things are the best!? I love this time of year for it's smells and flavors.

    xo http://noelebelle.blogspot.com

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Your comments are what makes this thing fun! I LOVE to hear from you and do my best to respond to everyone! THANK YOU!


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