Friday, October 26, 2012

Lesson 15: It's OK to Think Your Life Is Hard

In fairness, I actually had already written a 'Lesson 15' on how, even though everything is a lot more work once you have kids, it is also a lot more FUN.  But, in light of this week's response, etc. it felt a little forced (even though it is 100% true); and then yesterday, I randomly stumbled upon this article from the National Catholic Register back in January, which is just PERFECT for where we are in this discussion... Enjoy!


Lesson #15:  It's OK to Think Your Life Is Hard.

When I first read this article, I immediately had an uncontrollable urge to print hundreds of copies and mail them to every person I know with a baby, or heck, maybe even hand them out to strangers I meet at the playground or Starbucks with a little one in the stroller, crazy hair, yoga pants, and tired eyes. The words that writer, Simcha Fischer - who is a mother to NINE children - has for moms with only one child spoke straight to my heart. It is so encouraging and such a good reminder for new moms as we navigate this uncharted territory; I only wish I had found it earlier in the journey!

I've copied my favorite passage (with complete credit given to Simcha & the NC Register) below; but, in case you can't tell, I really think you should go read the whole thing...  And, maybe also print a copy and mail it anonymously to your friend with the three month old... just saying. :)

To become a mother, I had to learn how to care about someone more than I did about myself, and that was terrible.  But who I am now is something more terrible:  the protector who can’t always protect; the one with arms that are designed to hold, always having to let go.

Dear mother of only one child, don’t blame yourself for thinking that your life is hard.  You’re suffering now because you’re turning into a new woman, a woman who is never allowed to be alone.  For what?  Only so that you can become strong enough to be a woman who will be left.

Dear mother, don’t worry about enjoying your life.  Your life is hard; your life will be hard.  That doesn’t mean you’re doing something wrong—it means you’re doing it right.

That's good stuff friends!
Happy Friday!

P.S. You might have noticed that I never announced the winner of the Boy Oh Boy giveaway... Don't worry! In light of all the "drama" and over-posting in the last couple of weeks, I've decided to keep it open until THIS Sunday and announce a winner on Monday.  Please go enter HERE for a chance to win an adorable custom print!


This post is part of a series for 31 Days of Change hosted by The Nester. To see my other "lessons," click here.



8 comments:

  1. awesome! thanks for sharing! :)

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  2. Oh Elizabeth, your blog is just what I need lately. You can't even imagine how excited I get when I see a new post from you in my reader!

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  3. I'm about to be a new mom (38 weeks pregnant) and trying to wrap my mind around this. I am so ready to start this journey of motherhood, I will need to remember this for the hard parts of it. Thanks!

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  4. In all the articles, books, and blogs I've rever ead, I've never heard this before, but thank goodness I'm not alone. I always feel guilty when I start thinking about how hard my life is right now. I immediatly start thinking of others with lives ten times harder than mine, but really that doesn't take away from the fact that I'm having a hard day or feeling stressed out. I know how blessed I am, but I also know my life is not easy as a working mother with three kids 7, 5, and 1 years old, and a husband who works almost 80 hours some weeks.

    There is always someone better off and worse off than you, but I really want to stop comparing myself to others and feeling guilty. I want to live my life however hard or easy it may be, and try to enjoy it.

    We only have one life to live, lets make it count.

    Thanks E!

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  5. I read that article awhile ago. I loved it. So true.

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  6. I had a friend e-mail this to me after I had a baby but somehow I didn't end up seeing/reading it until many months later. I loved it. Because that time is SO hard, and no one usually tells you that... so I try to let my friends know as they become new mommies that it's ok to think it's hard and it's ok to not love every second of every day!

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  7. Hey, your article is really very informative and i want to thank you for this article.

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Your comments are what makes this thing fun! I LOVE to hear from you and do my best to respond to everyone! THANK YOU!


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