Friday, January 15, 2010

A Brief History of My Even Briefer Diets

If you are here from Kelly's Korner - THANK YOU for stopping by!!!  Leave a comment or become a follower so that you can "Show Me YOUR Life" too. :)

I feel like I should start with a little warning... This may not be the most "encouraging" thing you've read all day. :)  The truth is, I'm a big believer that you have to really know your past, before you can fully change the future.  And, if nothing else, I've discovered that being able to laugh at myself is GOOD FOR ME - maybe even AS important as five servings of fruits and vegetables a day.

So, with that in mind, I bring you...

"A Brief History of my Even Briefer Diets"
... I know "briefer" isn't really a word.

July 2003: After the dreaded "Freshman Fifteen" I joined Weight Watchers for the first time.  Two months in, I gained six pounds in one week, the woman told me she had "never seen anyone do that before," and I never went back.

April 2004: I trained for a 10K to mark it off my "Bucket List."  Didn't lose a dang pound, but felt good and looked better than I had since graduating from high school.

May 2004: Quit running.  Cold turkey.

August - December 2004: Lived in London.  Ate fried food at least once a day.  Lost weight from excessive walking.

January 2005: Continued eating fried food. Quit walking.  Gained weight. *Results typical.

January 2006: Graduated from college.  Moved home.  Allowed my mom to drag me to the gym in exchange for food and a place to sleep.

June 2007: Got married in a fitted strapless dress.  Felt really good.  (Could have used a spray tan, badly, but that's a whole other post.)

2007 - 2009: Started teaching.  Ate like I had Jeff's metabolism. Began ignoring my mom's phone calls. Joined Weight Watchers again.  Quit Weight Watchers again. 

September 2009: 21 Day "Skinny Bitch Detox."  Became "Bitch," not "Skinny."

October - December 2009: Went to one session with a trainer... Wasn't "hard enough" on me.  Quit trainer.  Started Weight Watchers... again. Tracked 2/7ths of the week.  Lost 3 pounds.

So, my advice... Don't beat yourself up.  Take a good look at your past and try to identify patterns.  (i.e. "I give up when I don't see results within, oh, 10 hours." OR "I look and feel best when I'm exercising.") And, be honest about your struggles and your goals.  Plus, it always helps to have a few loyal friends cheering you on.  (P.S. That's where YOU come in!)

My goal for this year... Heeding my own advice.  Getting healthy for ME.  And, allowing myself to laugh at the inevitable mess-ups and "relapses" along the way.

February 2010: Heart Shaped Bikini by Valentine's Day.  (Ok, maybe just a cute red dress in one size smaller... Baby steps.)


  1. E, Please describe,in vivid detail, what exactly a "heart shaped bikini" would look like....EVEN I can not even fathom... love you. (ps, why did not say that you have the great support of your loyal sister at

  2. My favorite part.... "Results Typical" are hilarious E!

  3. Two things:

    1. You look great.


  4. I loved reading about your diet mis-haps, thanks so much for sharing! Can you tell me more about this heart shaped bikini? I may want one too, ha!

  5. Hee! Loved this post! Good luck with your healthkick.


  6. I like this posting very much. Thanks for sharing mate

  7. Okay, I'm laughing out loud reading this at work! Love the *results typical and the became bitch, not skinny. Too funny!

  8. Found you from Kelly's Korner...LOVE your honest approach to dieting and exercise, can TOTALLY relate to quitting after not seeing results within hours, and hey-- we got married the same day!! Cool! :)


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