Monday, May 10, 2010

The Grass is Always Greener

Dear Yard,
I know we have not been the best parents to you.  It is true that we left you covered in a frozen tundra of snow all winter and crisp acidic leaves all fall.  I admit that a little too often we let our dog pee on you, and we don't give you near the vitamins and nutrients you need to live a healthy, hearty life.  BUT, we are pretty darn good to you on a regular basis.  We try to keep you properly mowed and watered - that was only ONE TIME that we left the sprinkler on overnight last week, and Jeff has worked very hard to patch up your "bald" spots these past few days.  I understand that you've had a hard life, but we are new at this, and would REALLY appreciate it if you'd "spunk up" a little bit.  One or two flowers every once in a while would be AWESOME.  And, we'd be overjoyed if you went a whole season without turning brown and dying.  Otherwise, we are seriously considering concrete... everywhere. You have simply left us with no choice. Thank you for your kind attention.
Sincerely,
Jeff and E


P.S. Please remember that your life could ALWAYS be WORSE.

1 comment:

  1. Does Jeff ever work out in the yard with his shirt off? If so, can you post pictures?

    ReplyDelete

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