Tuesday, July 16, 2013

Bachelorette: Dez Episode 8

For a while there, I wasn't sure we would ever make it this far; but (finally) we made it HOMETOWN DATES!!  I'm spicing things up a little today and sharing some very personal letters I've written to the "cast" and crew.  Enjoy!


Dear Zak's Sister & Brother,
You are pretty hot and, obviously, very concerned about your older brother who is in his mid thirties and still has resorted to looking for love on prime time television. #waytotakeonefortheteam  (BTW, I really love Zak - but the song? Not.a.fan.)

Dear Dez,
Why do you frown when you are happy? It is so confusing.

Dear Drew,
You need to stand in front of a fan or something after you gel your hair - it just isn't right.  BUT, you did seem pretty genuine on this date.  Your winning me over a little bit.

Dear Dez,
OH NO YOU DIDN'T draw pictures for Chris when Zak just did that for you last week. #lowblow

Dear Chris's sister (in law?) with the make-up & bangs,
Please get a make-under.

Dear Chris,
I am willing to excuse the fact that your father (and you) thought it was ok to "adjust" Dez on national TV.  I am absolutely NOT ok with whatever it was you had him do to your nose.


Dear Brooks' brother Dave (thanks name tag!), 
Please unbutton your top button.

Dear Brooks,
Let's try something new when you talk from now on -- open.your.mouth.

Dear Dez,
What is it, really, about Brooks?

Dear Producers,
I'm thinking Dez's brother for the next Bachelor.  No? (P.S. We all know he is an actor.)

Dear Dez's brother,
I totally understand that you are only a creeper because you want what is best for your sis.

Dear Dez,
This was a better week for you.  Not only did you wear some decent clothes; but, you also seemed like a real person.  (P.S. Brooks doesn't love you back and he's kind-of a dud.)

Dear Chris Harrison,
I can't speak for the rest of America; but, I'm pretty sure we can all tell just by watching when there is only one rose remaining...

Dear Zak,
You just weren't ridiculous enough for this show #consideritacompliment  (Um... I love you, but you were a little weird in the limo.)

Dear Drew,
You aren't going to win; but, you are a shoe-in for the next Bachelor.


Dear Producers,
I'm would consider loaning out Jeff for a few weeks if you want and then magically appear at the hometown dates and reveal that I am his wife and he has a son and a whole life in Virginia.  Now, that would be quality TV.  #thinkaboutit


And now, a little bonus for you - my favorite tweet of the night:
from The Possessionista - y'all, she cracks me up!

 Ha! What did you think this week?

P.S. Get your confessions ready! Link-up live tomorrow at 10AM!

6 comments:

  1. I want Zak's brother and sister to be the next Bachelor/Bachelorette. They were hot. Actually, so was his dad, but pretend I didn't just say that because that would be creepy. Love these letters, but I gotta go...I'm running late for my nose adjustment and I have a huge booger that I want to be showcased on NATIONAL TELEVISION. Oh no, wait, that's just Chris. Love Chris. Don't love his poetry or his HUGE ASS BOOGER.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Dez's whole happy-frown & "awww, that's so cute!" is totally GETTING ON MY NERVES! Get a new facial expression/line.

    Oh, and are we guessing that Brooks is leaving on his own? That's what I'm thinking. I've never heard them say they want a proposal from ____ guy, so OBVIOUSLY that's not how it's going to go down, right?! Plus she's wearing the same outfit on her date with Brooks that she was wearing in that "dramatic" crying scene in the promos from early on. Can't get anything past me ;-) Ha!

    This whole season just sucks, but I still watch faithfully every week. I'm really hoping we don't have a Bachelorette reject for the next Bachelor. It's time for something new!!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Maybe it's just me, but I think Brooks is a jerk. Hometown dates only solidified my belief. I'd prefer her to pick Drew or Chris... or even poor Zak. Anyone but Brooks (who I have the feeling will be dumping her next week.)

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  4. I think it's totally Brooks that is leaving and who she is broken up about. I can't believe she actually said on the show that she loves Brooks. I thought they weren't allowed to do that in order to keep the suspense? I am rooting for Chris to make it to the end (even though his family is weird) because I think they are cute. But honestly, I don't see any of these being lasting relationships which is kinda sad. It would be hard for me (if I was a guy) to watch this season when its on tv and seeing the girl saying that there is basically only one guy she wants && it not be you. I'd feel like I was always the second choice and that's no good.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I adore Zac. I'd be all for him being the next bachelor. And I think Drew is cute as can be but hardly looks old enough for have signed the legal forms on his own. Chris is my throw-away guy. Don't have a good or bad feeling about him. And I have to say, I've been waiting since episode 1 for Brooks to come out of the closet.

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  6. I really liked Zac and felt bad for him. He seemed pretty genuine. Chris was my favorite, but his family is definitely weird, and that booger really bumped him down a few levels in my mind. I don't know if I'm the only, but I am getting the gay vibe from Drew. Which is totally fine, but he shouldn't be on the bachelorette looking for love. and Brooks, ah, I don't know what she sees in him.

    ReplyDelete

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